Things That I Have Learned - G for Growing Up

Growing up in Queens was like a kaleidoscope of people, sights, sounds and colors. Weird but I do have a few memories as a baby.  I remember crawling on my grandmothers kitchen floor.  I can still picture the pattern of the linoleum as I made my way through the maze of chairs that where lined up around the table. My other memory, I am standing in my crib, my sister is still asleep, in her bed across the room.  I am leaning out looking down the long hall outside my room.  The front door to our flat was directly ahead of me.  The front door opens and my father who worked nights is coming home from long night of driving a NYC sanitation truck.   I can still hear the clicking of the refrigerator door opening and closing as my mother makes him something to eat.

Each morning during the school year my sister and I would get up each morning and  walk the ten blocks  to Our Lady of Miraculous Medal.  At lunch time we would take the trek home again, eat quickly and walk back to school for the afternoon lessons.  Our playground was the street where we would play baseball and games like red rover with the all the neighborhood kid.  We would play until someone would yell "CAR COMING!" we would immediately all move to the side of the street until the car passed and then like there was no interruption at all would resume our games.

Snowstorms brought school closings and sleigh rides down  Dead Mans Hill which was at the top of my street.  My sister and I  would come home to hot chocolate, sitting in front of our black and white TV, wrapped in a big warm blanket watching Million Dollar Movie.

In the summer we would all congregate on each others front stoops and read the piles of comic books that were collected over the winter.  We would read the same ones over and over until we would decide to pool are pennies and go down to the corner candy store to pick out new ones.  In the evenings, after dinner, parents and kids alike would sit out enjoying the gentle night breezes. Some nights we would get an old mayonnaise jar with holes poked in the top and catch lightening bugs or sit around in a circle listening to Mr Stark tell us ghost stories, that would scare us all but we still stayed to hear more.

I look back at those time and smile at all the fun times I had growing up.  Life was so good back then. So, what I have learned is that I need to bring some of those care free feelings of my youth into my adult life and try not to take life so seriously.

I am certainly not going to run after lightening bugs, hmmm or maybe I will.

Mary Ann

Things That I Have Learned - F for Floricide

Today is the start of a new week in the April A to Z blogger challenge and the letter of the day is F.  This could have been an easy one for me since I could have used my F for two things that are extremely close to me, Friends or Family, but why keep it easy.   So my blogger word for today is  Floricide - The killing of flowers.

I love flowers.  The array of colors and the wonderful smells.  Every spring they represent a new beginning. Winter is over and sun and fun is up ahead.  So every May I go to a nursery and take in their beauty. I roam around up and down each aisle for what seems like hours, finally making my choices. I take them home and lovingly plant them.

In the beginning I am very diligent about watering.  I find myself hymning as I pull each annoying weed that will hurt my little sweet friend.  May becomes June and I am still going pretty strong with my daily routine of watering and weeding.  July I start to slack off a bit and my poor flowers some days are looking rough around the edges.  OK so by them time mid August comes around I am totally done and have killed at least half of the flower crop.  I should feel guilty but I am not.  I do not see myself as a cruel person but by August I am done with the blaring heat and humidity and its every flower for herself at this point.

I admit it I AM A FLOWER KILLER!!!!!!!  My wanted poster should be hung from every nursery in America.  So what I have learned is that a flower killer like myself should always buy artificial to save the poor little plants from imminent destruction, but May is right around the corner. I am thinking spring and flowers and their beauty, hmmmmm maybe this year I will be better.  The poor flowers can only hope anyway.

THIS IS A RESULT OF A FLOWER KILLER

Mary Ann

Things That I Have Learned - E for Enjoy!!!!!

The dictionary meaning for the word enjoy is  To receive pleasure or satisfaction from.

Sounds like such a simple task to enjoy, but so many of us do not take the time to enjoy.  In my youth I took such pleasure in the simple things in life, like a bike ride with friends after dinner on a hot summer night, going to a movie matinee with my mom on a day that she played hooky from work,  Christmas morning when under the tree was all the things that I had asked Santa for.  Unfortunately  as time goes on and life unfolds its often hard to take those moments to enjoy.

I feel like in so many ways I have spent my life racing to a finish line, always having so much on my plate and never having enough time to enjoy the things that are going on around me.  I am sure I am not alone.  I see many of us doing the same thing, putting off things that make us happy on the back burner.  We are just way too busy to stop and smell the roses.  

So what I have learned is that life is way too short. I need to take time to enjoy the wonderful things that I have every single day.  I am certainly not there yet but I am trying as hard as I can to get to that place. This finish line is just up ahead and its worth racing to.

Mary Ann

Things That I Have Learned - D for Dancing

As far back as I can remember I wanted to learn to dance.  I remember twirling around the living room, leaping from sofa to chair using my most graceful moves or so I thought at the time.  My mother must have also thought they were pretty darn good because when I was six she started to research dance studios in the area in Queens where we lived.  After going to a number of recitals of different studios my mother decided that Paul's Dance Studio, was the one that would take me to the top.   Top of what I'm not sure but my mom sure did take it seriously.

Well Paul's did not just take anyone, so I had to audition for him.  At the time I do not remember being nervous because I don't think I even knew what an audition meant.  So one Saturday morning my mom, sister and I went to his rehearsal studio (which was different from his dance studio) I twirled around a few times and made such an impression that I was immediately accepted.  I remember Paul turning to my sister and telling her that she also had great potential. What!!!! all she was doing is standing there looking bored.  My mother of course was so proud that my sister had potential, even while looking annoyed and irritated that she was also signed up for dance lessons.  Thinking back I am sure that if a clucking chicken  had wandered  in for an audition with a check in his beak he too, would have had potential according to Paul's standards.

My mother did not drive and my dad worked on Saturday so for five years using buses and a train we would take the 2 hour trek from my home in Middle Village to Woodside for lessons at Paul's dance studio.  Giving up my Saturdays each week did not bother me because I loved to dance so much.  On the other hand my sister and her great potential, complained and moaned every Saturday that she had to go and leave her friends.

I remember vividly the moment that I decided to stop taking lessons.  Every year Paul put on this unbelievable recital production.  There was always a theme and that year it was Around the World In Eighty Days.  Since all our costumes were custom made, (nothing but the best for Paul) we each had to be measured to ensure the perfect fit.  It was my turn to go in, I was eleven at the time and as the lady wrapped the tape measure around my waist she said, "wow you must love your pasta".  I already knew I was chunky but by saying those words to me it totally changed what I thought of myself.  How could I dance if I was heavy, I was totally embarrassed.   I finished out the year but refused to go back the next year, to my sisters delight.

My mother was so disappointed, she tried everything to change my mind but I would not budge. So my dancing career ended at the young age of eleven. I am sure that I would not have gone on to win any awards or had a starring role in a Broadway show but I gave up something I loved because of a few offhanded words that someone said to me.

So what I have learned is not to let others define who you are and what you love with words or actions.  A few years ago a few co workers and I took a dance class.  We could not remember the steps and most of the time we laughed through the lesson but we all had a great time and we all loved every minute of it.  We probably need to take another class soon.

Mary Ann

Things That I Have Learned - C for Charitable

Very few of us are at the financial level of Donald Trump or Bill Gates who give millions each year to charities.  I for one have limited funds and could never contribute large sums of money to those in need, although it would be really great if I could.  So instead I try and give what I can by sponsoring someone walking or running for a charitable event or giving money to a friend in need.  Being charitable to others can be as simple as helping an elderly lady get something off the top shelf at a super market or extending a few quarters to the person at a parking meter next to you that just ran out of change.  Its just caring about others around you everyday.

Once in awhile a charitable situation comes your way and you are forced (OK wrong word) nudged into giving.  In the fall of 1981 my husband and two children moved to upstate NY.  By Feb I was so homesick and was missing my parents terribly.  I decided that during the winter break the kids and myself would take a visit to my parents on Long Island.  Since I was nervous to drive the 5 hours alone with the kids in downstate traffic, I decided that the bus would be a great alternative.  So on an extremely warm day in Feb my husband drove us to the Albany bus terminal so we could take the 5 hour journey to my parents. When we arrived the bus was not there yet so we sat down and placed our things next to us.  Because it was such a warm day I had laid my brand new mauve pink winter coat ( yes it was mauve, very popular in the 80's) in back of me on the chair.  They announced that our bus had arrived, we quickly grabbed our things, hugged and kissed my husband goodbye and boarded the bus.  As the bus was pulling out I realized too late that I had left my new mauve coat on the seat in the bus terminal.  Since those were days before cell phones there was no way to reach my husband until 5 hours later when we arrived in Long Island.

As soon as I could I called my husband and he promised that he would go back to the bus terminal first thing in the morning to look for my coat.  He assured me not to be concerned, that it probably was turned into lost and found and he would get my coat back for me.  The next morning at my parents the phone rang bright and early and sure enough it was my husband calling me from the bus station.  I found your coat he said.  OMG I was elated.  I am starring at it right now.  OK great, I said take it home.  Not that easy he said I am starring at a homeless man in the bus terminal and he is wearing your mauve pink coat.  WHAT!!!!!  oh no. He informed me that the security guard said that if he offered the homeless man a few dollars he would probably give me back my coat.  With my excitement of finding my coat now deflated, I declined, knowing for sure that the homeless man needed my coat way more then I did.

So the thing that I have learned is that being charitable comes in all shapes and sizes and sometime when we least expect it.  Hope he enjoyed my mauve pink coat.

Mary Ann

Things That I Have Learned - B for Baseball

I would have to say I dislike sports in general.  I have never, ever been athletic in any way. When I was little my dad and sister would play catch and I often would beg to join them. To shut me up they would make me monkey in the middle (not sure if anyone even plays that anymore)  They would throw the ball back and forth and my goal was to try and steal the ball as it flew past me high in the air.  Well surprise, surprise, I never was able to steal and after awhile, to my sister and fathers delight I would get bored, walk away and find a doll to play with.

I met my husband many years later, and since I loved sports so much, NOT it was only fitting that he was, and still is obsessed with baseball.  I soon found out that the same man who could not remember to take out the trash or close down the toilet seat could recall a baseball play from years before.

As time went on I was dragged to a baseball game or sucked into watching it on TV.  I really tried to get into it but it was really not my thing.  When my son was born he was schooled early on  baseball players names and stats but did not seem overly interested. As he grew so did his interest in baseball. We as a family spent many years sitting for two to three nights a week all spring and sometimes into summer watching my son play. Although I still did not a enjoy the game I loved rooting for him and watching him enjoy himself. I also loved the social aspects of the games, the feeling of comradery with other parents cheering on the team.  In looking back those years were some of the most enjoyable, sitting out on a beautiful spring evening watching my husband help coach and my son run with full force trying to steal home plate.

My son is now an adult and has his own son.  My grandson will be playing baseball for the first time in a few weeks.  My son has volunteered to be the coach.  So even though I still do not love baseball or sports in general I will be sitting in the front row cheering on my grandson and welling up with pride at what a great dad my son has become.

What I have learned is that spending time with my family and watching them do things that they love makes the experience so much better.  I still do not like baseball but I love that my husband, son and now grandson have bonded over something that they all love and enjoy.

Goofy side of my son and grandson

Mary Ann

Things That I Have Learned - A for Alphabet

When I decided that I would do this challenge again this year I was hoping that a theme would come to me. Last year not knowing what to expect I  totally flew by the seat of my pants every single day.  Well since I have lived more years then I care to admit I decided to go with the theme of Things That I Have Learned. There has to be tons of things that I can use on that subject,  Right?  Hmmmmm, okay, so not so much.  On day one I was stumped already, until I looked at the name of the challenge.  A to Z, YIKES!!!! of course the alphabet.

From the time we say our first words we are encouraged to learn the alphabet.  It starts with a cute alphabet song that was written a very long time ago, in 1835.  Every child learns it, to the delight of their parents, who usually make them perform it over and over again for friends and family alike.  Little did we know as babies when we learned that sweet simple little song  that each one of those letters combined with other letters would one day open up our world to words and reading and of course who could forget the A to Z April Blogger Challenge.

So in closing, what I have learned is that for all of us no matter where we live or what language we speak the alphabet is in the center of it all.

Day 1 is done, off to create day 2 of the challenge, using the alphabet to create words that hopefully others will read.

Mary Ann